A Friendly Chat
by Nadine25
Summary: After Going to hell evil overlords Aizen and Madara go to a cafe' to have a little chat that leads to the discovery of what went wrong with their lives and a poor waitress gets scarred for life. Rated T for language


_**This isn't much really just something that has been stuck in my head for a while. I just had to get it out so please if you like it let me know cuz it would mean a lot to me. If you don't, also let me know, but please be nice *insert puppy dog eyes here***_

_**Ok so AAizen and Madara go to hell (dah) and once they're there the two have a talk about what they did and did not do. **_

**A Friendly Chat **

Tall dark and handsome this sums up the two men who just walked into the café'." Oh God this is so unfair, no one should be allowed to look that beautiful, I mean come on" the waitress thought as she watched them take their respective seats facing each other. No words were exchanged between the two men as they sat and looked at their menus. After a few seconds one of them simply raised his hand for the waitress to come. She approached them with fan girl excitement, doing her very best not to squeal as the one with the crimson eyes raised his head to look at her.

"Welcome to café Haden how may I help you" she asked when she finally managed to speak

"I'll have some black coffee" eyeing her with a hint of amusement in his eyes Madara said monotonously

"Yes sir" she replied as soon as he spoke

"And I'll have some tea" commanded AAizen not even raising his head to look at her

None of them said please or showed even the slightest hint of emotion. They looked too dangerous for her to even be standing that close, but by God they were gorgeous you can't help but stare at them, and she did.

"Do you need something?" the Uchiha questioned

"Um, ah no sir" she stuttered

"Then leave" he ordered

And she did

By the time she returned with their order the place where they were sitting was almost swamped with people, scratch that, women, lots of women, everywhere. They were all trying to be subtle as they stole glances at the two fine male specimens but they were failing miserably.

Soon the two men asked to be moved to a private booth where they can talk without being interrupted. Once she escorted them there Madara spoke "why don't you join us?"

"whaaa" she blurted out confused

Aizen looked equally confused

"What are you talking about Madara?" Oh Kami even his voice is sexy she thought

"Listen Sosuke we're not getting anywhere with this conversation so we need an impartial party to act as referee or we'll be here all night"

"And you think this woman could do it?"

"Well unless you have someone else in mind she's our only choice"

"Sit" Aizen ordered

She instantaneously sat down without even thinking, it just seemed like a horrible idea to oppose him or even question what he says, "oh who am I kidding he's just too hot" she thought.

Madara started "Do you know who we are?"

"Not really" she said

"I'm Uchiha Madara and that is Sauske Aizen" he said offhandedly "during our lifetimes we both had huge plans to achieve our goals, however now we're facing a dilemma"

She stared dumbly back at him and when he was sure she wasn't in any condition to question him or even acknowledge what he said he pushed on.

"The problem is… "He was cut off by Aizen

"The problem is we both think that our respective plans were the best, Madara doesn't really feel like what he attempted to do was simply ridiculous"

"You turned into a butterfly you dip shit" Madara blurted

"At least I didn't attempt to use the moon as a mirror you overbearing moron" Aizen retorted abandoning his normally stoic attitude

"It was a great plan and it would've worked if it wasn't for that idiot…"

"oh shut up what the hell are you talking about using the moon to reflect your Sharingan and take over the world is a stupid concept, I mean why not just use power to subdue everyone you've gotten overly poetic that's all"

"Oh I've gotten overly poetic, you attempted to use a stupid rock to destroy everything and everyone and become a king of your own domain, how ridiculous is that" he paused "and you turned into a bloody butterfly" he added with an evil smirk

"Would you stop returning to that?"

"I most definitely will not"

"Well fine then you posed as a hyper active lollipop faced idiot for years, how ridiculous is that? What is it Uchiha did your parents not feed you enough sweets as a kid" Aizen retorted

"NO, THEY DID NOT" Madara screamed

"NEITHER DID MINE" Aizen declared just as loudly

For a moment the two men looked at each other with expressionless faces while the waitress was simply too dumbstruck by what was happening to utter a word.

"I mean I asked and I asked and then I asked again, all I wanted was a bar of chocolate every once in a while, but no, all their love went for my beloved little brother" Madara said in a whisper obviously choking back his tears "so I took his eyes" Madara finished his eyes flashing bright red "you should have seen them" Madara added with a chilling evil grin

"mine were similar, they kept going on and on about how good little boys shouldn't have too much candy" he said "so I became a very good little boy, I gave them everything they ever wanted, became the head of squad five then I crushed all their dreams as I betrayed everyone and took what was rightfully mine" he added with an evil laugh "I finally had the right to change my hair style and take off my glasses, take that mom and dad"

"I see it now" Madara said, "it served them right"

"Yes it did, and I bet yours were devastated when you did what you did" Aizen said with a smirk

"They were" the Uchiha said triumphantly

"Well that was a good talk" Madara added

"You're such a good listener" Aizen said with a smile directed at the waitress who to their surprise was now passed out on the floor

"Well then why don't we go do something productive with our time" Madara suggested

"Like what"

"We cans see who's in charge of this place and overthrow him how about that"

"That sounds great" Aizen replied excitedly "How do you propose we do it"

"Let's use a combination of both of our methods"

"Oh I see where you're going with that, you want to transform the moon into a giant butterfly which would attack everyone" Aizen suggested

"Exxactly" Madara replied with a grin

"You're on"

And just like that started the exhilarating tale of Madara and Sosuke vs. Lucifer


End file.
